Thursday 5 April 2007

Letter to Richard Caborn - 16th January 2007

The Rt Hon Richard Caborn MP
Minister for Sport
Department for Culture, Media and Sport
2-4 Cockspur Street
London
SW1Y 5DH

16th January 2007

Dear Rt Hon Caborn

2012 Olympics

Like most of the country I was delighted when Great Britain was awarded the 2012 Olympic Games. What an honour for us all! What an opportunity for the country! And what a sight to see those French faces when the announcement was made! Like you, it made my year seeing their little red faces. I did notice that little smirk on your face as well – right on Right Hon!

I’ve already written to Seb and urged him to grasp this opportunity to show the world what a show we Brits can put on – mind you, we must put our minds to it. I’ve hinted to him that he doesn’t rely on those two clowns in Downing Street for too much help either. Mind you, from what I’ve heard you haven’t got that much time for them either. Rest assured that despite what the TV and newspapers show – we all know who it is that’s doing the spade work whilst the Dynamic Duo claim the credit. So keep it up your Honour!

For my part I’ve decided to embrace this Olympic opportunity 100%. But not for me a passive role as a spectator.

I’m going to take part.

So, I’ve begun my training and preparation for the Olympic Marathon. I know that you’ve done a bit of running in your time - well so have I! Indeed, I’ve even done the marathon distance before. In fact – and I don’t like to sound too negative about our country’s heroes - but, unlike certain marathon runners I could name, I can at least safely say that I’ve finished every marathon I’ve started (and I’ve never felt the need to stop off for a number two half way round either).

You’ll also be relieved to know that I’m not going for a typical Brit performance. You know what I mean - try my damned hardest and finish second. Nope – no Henman/Ashes Squad/Twickenham clown performance from me. That gold medal has got my name written on it. Twixt you and me, my dream is to turn the corner on the Mall and give it the old sprint finish and leave a couple of Frenchies gasping in my wake. A pipedream? Well, to some maybe. But not to this kiddie – I’m your man for Gold your Rt Honship!!

Now I’ll cut to the chase. I’ve sorted out my entry for the race with Seb and he’ll no doubt be sending me the uniform and so forth in due course.

My training involves me taking part in a number of events both at home and overseas – this spring I’ll be taking part in races in the UK, Belgium, Holland, France, Luxembourg and Kent. And I thought it would be a great idea if I were to become one of your roving Olympic Games Ambassadors. I’m not too bad at the old diplomacy thing – so long as I don’t have to stomach too much of the foreign food anyway. And I’m OK with wine and beer – what I mean by that is that I can take my beer (not like some Archbishops we could mention eh?) which means I’m a safe pair of hands when there’s the odd reception to attend. So, I’d be happy to spread the word about the 2012 Games – tell them how good its going to be, maybe flog a few tickets and grease the odd palm here and there.

What do I get out of it? Well there’s the pride of representing my country before the games as well as during it; there’s the chance to get involved with some of our foreign mates on a more formal basis. And I’d like to wear some Olympic gear – now that would really set me apart when I’m tanning the hides of Johnny Foreigner wouldn’t it? My next little jolly is to Bruges on March 4th for the Ostend to Bruges 10 Miler – so if you could swing it to get me something with the old Olympic rings to run in I’d be ever so chuffed.

If you want to know where I’m racing – and also keep up with my training schedule and how I’m getting on with my Olympic preparations check me out on the internet at www.ronhillsalterego.blogspot.com.

You can send any uniforms or badges through to me at the above address – and I realise I’ll have to sign the Official Secrets Act too – so send all that gubbins round as well.

And that’s it! Good luck with the training for your next run your Honour – and the best of luck too with the building work.

Keep on tapering


Ron

PS Would I be entitled to have any letters after my name? The Rt Hon Ron OlymAmb sounds neat doesn’t it?

Response from Tom Powell, Department of Media, Culture and Sport dated 12th February.

Dear Ron

Thank you for your letter to the Minister who has asked me to respond.

I am delighted that you are so focused on the Olympic games in 2012 and I look forward to seeing you standing proud on the podium.

Good luck with the training.

Yours sincerely

Tom Powell

Now that I've got the endorsement from the Minister - note; not a penny paid in backhanders either (are you reading Mr Blair?) - just you watch the commercial deals come flooding in now!

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